Chilling!

Do you ever think about some of the craziness of the way we go about living life? We race the clock only to try and relax when the rush of things is over. Chilling out is kind of a novelty to seventy percent of the world. How do you define chilling out also? For many it is feet up and sitting in front of a very big screen. Others maybe a good nap. Some reading an interesting article or book. Some others in a chair near a mountain lake or stream. Maybe even by a toasty warm fire with a loved one sharing a good blanket. Even the special kind of chilling out cuddles and hugs from a grandkid or four.

For many years we have been chilling out camping in the backcountry. Not always considered chilling out for some peeps in this life. We often spend hundreds if not thousands of dollars to go live like a nomad or homeless person in the hopes that we can connect with the earth and maybe reset our internal body clock. I have heard many comments on just this kind of activity. “No sleeping in the woods for me, there are bears and snakes out there, but there's no Wi-Fi, my skin and hair don't mix well with dirt and campfire smells, and so on. Then there is the flip side of the comments. Woke up early and the sun rise was just breathtaking, ate breakfast watching the deer and elk wandering past, caught the biggest one of them all today, and the best one, I haven't missed my alarm clock one bit.

They say even a bad day fishing beats a good day at work. I get that not everyone chills out with rod and reel but hopefully ya see the digs of it. So, what is it that gets your chill on? For some it maybe a combo thing with chill and thrill too. Yeah. Ya have to go there to be there. Rappelling a waterfall, catching a northern Pike and nearly breaking a pole, or jumping from a plane and trusting a sheet of fabric to let ya down slowly. Think of it may be riding the biggest rollercoaster or floating the lazy river. Skiing down a black diamond run in the steep and deep with untracked powder. Dropping off the K12 so to speak (so of you 80’s peeps may remember that one).

Take that time however you must and live life. If not, we only look back on things, we regret that we didn't do more fully than the things we do. Granted I have a few do’s that may have been a well you shouldn't have done that but I'm more guilted by why “dint's”. So, ski, fish, and yes even nap so you feel chilled and leave fewer what ifs.

Today is a key day.

Today is a key day.

Twelve Steps and God have changed many a soul for the better. By recognizing where the pain, and key issues are in life we come to understand ourselves and realize how and what changes us to be better. It never happens over night and in some cases takes us even years to truly and fully understand ourselves. The steps of change may seem to be written so simply but yet they can well be some of the most complexed things any soul may ever face.

 Climbing a rock face may seem easier than changing our thinking enough to make a better life for ourselves.  Never take for granted some of the best climbs are better with a secure anchor and not going at it free solo. Having a belayer with you in life is worth everything when you find yourself in a tight spot or two. With God as a belayer failing is not an option but soloing is certain failure, even death. Never underestimate how far you can go with heavens help. Don’t get me wrong the steps of recovery is possible for anyone that willing to pay the price to find sobriety and serenity.

Today is a key day for my personal recovery and it marks another year to chalk up as clean and sober. There have been many a peak, rock face, and canyon that have challenged me over the years but the twelve steps have been the hardest challenges of all. This past week I had another opportunity to speak to a Fireside (group of people gathered to hear a speaker) gathering and pass along to them the need to always climb in life with a belayer and a secure anchor. Life is also worth living is another pass along too, as I have a time or two been to some dark places of the soul. It may get hard and crazy at times but ending the story before its time is not a great way to finish a story. 

God is a master of life and in spite of some flaws we all may have does and always will love us. If you’re some of those that have fought the fight of recovery and are doing it, inspire others. Pass along to them there is hope and it is possible to overcome addictive vices and behaviors. Be so focused on Gods will that others will find him. God loves you and me! "One day at a time" and yes, "we can and do recover."

Papas favorite back country shepherds pie

*Papa’s back country Shepard’s pie*

1lb ground beef

1 onion

24 oz pasta sauce

16 oz mix veggies frozen

2- 4 oz packages Idahoan potatoes

Brown beef and onion and set aside. Make potatoes as directed. Steam veggies. Warm sauce. In 9x13 cake pan layer ingredients topping with the potatoes. Heat in oven until hot and the house smells awesome. Add the seasonings desired for the flavor you prefer in the beef. For easy clean up Papa uses one time use pans. Papas favorite flavor of potatoes is the four cheese. Enjoy!

**Best when made camping in a dutch oven

Thirty Adventurous years!

Thirty adventurous years with moves and kids and much more. Marriage is not always rainbows and butterflies but some place in there you find where you fit together with each other. When you get past some of the crazy stuff you find out that being a bit crazy is all good too. She knows I am a bit of an ugly stick with a reel full of knotted up line and a hook with a fly that even a trash fish would laugh at but tells me I still have a place in her heart. Yet we have some cool kids and those grand kids are the bomb.

Two things I know have been the key for us and these may seem a bit odd to some. We are on the same page with each other and God. Yep if you have yourself a union based on love and God things do work best. Now I have seen a lot of married peeps that struggle much harder when they fight due to some parts of faith or no faith but over all it works for many. My attendance in church has always been a struggle because I don’t care for big crowds of people but my biggest thrill is holding her hand and knowing she is happy I am there with her. The other thing I would have to call Intimate Communication. Talk about everything. Yep, the good, the bad, and the ugly. I mean everything too. And when I say everything I mean from Money to Whoopee and everything in the middle. Be kind and considerate as you do. We have learned it is easier to walk and talk holding hands.

Find your common ground and embrace your difference. If you have kids take the time in there to relish time away now and then without the kids too. When you get to the point of an empty nest it is easier to relate to one another with out the kids as common ground. Find things together. Explore your passions and get to know your spouse’s passions. Not everything that I like does she like but be good at showing interest in those things as best you can. Find a passion together and ya just don’t know but in a roundabout way it can add to the passion between ya.

A few years ago, I did a post about things we have learned about us. Well add this one to that and understand life is continually changing. We have gone to many more seminars and conferences together and read a few more books also. We are counselors and we can tell you we have a lot more to learn about us. Love and marriage is an adventure. It helps if you focus on the scenery as you go and not when to we get to the summit. One day you could get to that point in life of bald, fat, wrinkly, blind, deaf, and senile and realize you missed life in some way or another.

So live life with adventure. Tell each other you love each other every moment you can even in those times when your so up set with each other you could spit nails and road tar. Yes, life is short and even though I feel there is more to this life than just the life we see. Kiss like it is your last kiss or your first kiss. If you have kids be so sappy that they are embarrassed by it because they may just thank you for it some day (my kids have).

May the next bunch of years be as much excitement as the first thirty has been. Happy thirty-year anniversary to the best Crazy Soul wife.

Mad Tooth!

Mad tooth

Never underestimate the power of the madness of a tooth. Thankfully we have come up in the world with regards to dental help. The days of bite the bullet have come and gone but there have been a few times it crossed my mind.  Some time ago I went to the dentist with hopes of a simple checkup and cleaning. A Thursday morning appointment seems easy. Right! By Friday noon ish and I am climbing the walls and ready to go eight rounds in the MMA cage with a wild critter with the craziness of pain. So, wouldn't ya know no one is in the dental office that I had the cleaning done in to help me with the after math of the killer madness in my mouth. My dear wife with her heart of gold does her best to find me a dentist with heart to help my case of trouble. Being in so much discomfort I considered resorting to pulling out my own tooth. Yep, the thought comes to some of us that have lots of tools around. Luckily, we found an office open, with time to spare me a bit of a looksee at the enraged chopper. Any one that has known me for some time, knows I don't find comfort in a chair for dental purposes.

 I would rather visit with a doctor or a dentist in the canyons or the woods than their office. Seated in the chair and looking out the window thinking about how this royally bites. Doc J as we will call him enters the small room. We get the howdies done and get to the let's have a look around. Some touch and probing and we can tell the general area and tooth. So just to be sure and clear Doc J does a somewhat simple and small test for clarifying the exact irritated spot. A super frosty Q-tip and Wow! I was a thrashing like a crazy soul a looking to exit the window. Mind ya me moving forward with that much effort would be like maybe a Bear after me kind a deal. By this time the Doc is like yep “we call that a hot tooth”. Hot or mad either way is fine kind of a mess to be in on a Friday afternoon. He is like we're not drilling in to that critter today. We will have to give it some antibiotics and pain relief for a few days to get it workable. Knowing how life goes for me with some substances I would cross my fingers with some 800 ibu and clove oil and hope for the best for the weekend. Anyone been mouth and tooth impaired knows ya get to the point of “I so much need a burger and fries” kind of hungry. Between pain and starvation, it really reminded me of having tonsils out in midlife. Yes, I had my tonsils out in my thirties. Soft foods do not do life justice by any means and if someone should be bold enough to try to tell you anything different they have obviously been living with too tight of jeans on. I was sure hoping for the Hulk to rock me to sleep or even Thor to tap me with his hammer upside the head so I could get a little shut eye. By the time Monday morning came I was thinking why it can’t be Tuesday already this is getting super old. But by Tuesday morning I was just wanting to sleep in, I was dragging around like a zombie. Wouldn't ya know I was thrilled to cheese on crackers at an ants family picinic to go to the dentist for once in decades. Mind ya I still would have been happy with seeing Doc J out in the back country and not with his pricey chair in his office. 

About this time, I am reminded of the John Wayne saying “courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyways”. I saddled up and found my way to the dental chair. Doc J worked magically and at a point in the process turned some of the task of the madness to his very skilled partner Doc B for the extreme curved rooting of the mad tooth. One of those super hard to get at curvy rooted monster teeth. There are moments that I haven’t feel super excited to be in that pricey chair but being numbed of the pain was relieving. Do not underestimate the driving force of pain to change the course of daily living in one form or another. The worst smells, feelings, and sounds have always been around the dentist or doctor cubicle for me and they aren't some fond memories either but I couldn't think of them at the time. Happy to have that pain to a livable point and knowing I still would have to return for a crown, I thought of ways to get out of sitting in that chair any time soon. I will tell you that I have had lots of pain filled times from road rash and burns to head smacks with hard objects.

 Some painful moments being a bit more emotional than physical. I recommend meeting people in more joyous ways than at painful rock bottom but should you be in a painful situation I hope you have good people that help you find relief. Hopefully those people that help you with your struggles have some super great friends and associates that are there to back them up. As much as some of the biggest tough guys would like you to think they don't fight battles with an army of prime picked gladiators they are more successful with some friends by their side or even behind them. Still not feeling super excited for visiting the dentist but should I find myself crawling walls in pain I hope that help is there with someone like Doc J.