Being open and honest
Visiting with our kids now that they are married is a whole
different set of discussions. Being empty nesters and some of our kids in the
newly wed stage there are some stories that are certainly funny thinking about
the embarrassment and blushed faces of a number of people you know well. Yes,
finances, faith, intimacy, and children are subjects that should be openness
more than they are at times in family discussions. Hopefully, there is an
openness with some of the other subjects such as addiction, health issues, parenting
and so on. Mind you, we are probably not the perfect modeling of parents out
there in the world but we are learning. Key point of this is be open and honest
in your parenting and in your relationships.
A number of years ago there was always this hush hush kind
of thing around sensitive topics and mind you they are topics to be addressed
carefully but never treat any of them as a hush hush thing. When the moments
come along to teach youth/children be sure to do it. Now if you’re not
comfortable with the subject that comes up and you aren’t sure how to handle
things let them know you plan to address things but you need time to figure out
the best way to present it. If that uncomfortableness is due to not having a
knowledge of the subject or how to present it that pause can well give you time
to get the ducks in a row or at least in the same pond. Now I say this because
there have been many a time, I was unsure as to how to present things to my
kids. We need kids that know why not to do something and not just don’t.
A very young feller
told my wife that he didn’t so much like a famed movie cowboy because he drank
and smoked. Now it is good that he has realized that use of tobacco and alcohol is a
not so good choice but there is another lesson that can be taught here all people
can be good people and make not so good of choices. We all make choices in life
but not all of them are best but that doesn’t lessen our value as a person and
God still loves us even when we have a hard time walking the straight lines.
Talk to youth and
your kids about life. Four things I can’t say enough about that you should be
super open with your kids about are: Faith and God, Finances and money,
Addictions and personal pit falls, and Intimacy/sex and their identity. You
want to change the world love your family, and if you want to super-size that
change, love and teach your family. We live in a time and age now that if we
don’t teach our kids about life the world will teach them and there are way too
many wrong and misguided stacks of information out there that they will get
things mixed up and even wrong. God loves us and wants the best for us. He
wants us to be happy and find joy in life.
Now I don’t think every kid will be "a church going every Sunday kind of person" but hopefully we can at the least teach them some correct principles of
life that they can be good citizens and contribute to the communities that they
live in and to their own families.
